


Attention Kidnapped!

by LumiNQuill



Series: Rumir Oneshots [1]
Category: The Two Princes (Podcast)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cecily helps, Cute Ending, F/F, Fake kidnapping dw, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Kidnapping, Light Angst, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, POV Third Person, Rupert needs attention, Swordfighting, mentions of explosive arrows, porridge is done with their crap, sexist councils suck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:34:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24929233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LumiNQuill/pseuds/LumiNQuill
Summary: Amir is busy dealing with their sexist council, Rupert needs attention, Cecily is there to help and Porridge is done with their crap.
Relationships: Lady Cecily/Sir Joan (Two Princes Podcast), Prince Amir/Prince Rupert (Two Princes Podcast)
Series: Rumir Oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1804171
Comments: 8
Kudos: 71





	Attention Kidnapped!

Rupert’s feels the bedcovers beside him with his hand for the warmth of his husband’s body. With a small huff he sleepily sits up and he realizes that, once again, Amir is gone.

Amir and Joan have been busy up to their necks these last couple of weeks. Waking up early in the morning and working until late in the evening to try and change the laws so more lady knights could join their ranks is not an easy task after all. And it required all of Amir’s attention. Rupert doesn’t like that, - don’t get him wrong he has nothing against having more strong knights, - but he needs attention from his husband too dammit.

He looks over towards his nightstand to check the old wooden clock for the time when he sees a small note perched against it, he picks it up rubs some sleep from his eyes and reads it.

_Good morning my adorable sleeping husband, You were turning and tossing around a lot last night, so I hope you had a good rest. I will see you again at lunch, I miss you already. – Your very handsome husband Amir. ;)_

Rupert smiles a little at the swirly handwriting, he grabs the box from under the bed and opens it to a big pile of small notes threatening to spill out. He leaves the note with all the others he got from Amir and pushes the box back under the bed. As he sinks back under the covers, he thinks about the fact he just isn’t able to stay mad at his lover when he leaves such sweet notes every morning just to make Rupert feel less lonely. Oh well, it’s a little past eight am anyways, he can sleep in a little longer.

*

“Alright boys! Go fetch!” Rupert throws the stick as hard as he can, and he sees Porridge and Fitsroy immediately sprint after it. The cute dragon flaps his wings enthusiastically to get a little ahead of the dog as they run down the hill. Rupert loves playing outside with them when the weather is nice. If only he could share these kinds of memories a little more often with Amir…

He is pulled from his negative thoughts when all of a sudden something tackles him to the ground, and before Rupert’s mind can catch up to what just happened he feels Porridge’s tongue scrape over his cheek, his tail wagging enthusiastically from side to side as he makes a small growling noises.

“Wha-“ Rupert laughs, “how did you get back here so fast boy? Did you use those big wings of yours to fly up the hill? – ohoho yes you did! - such a good baby dragon!” Rupert says affectionately.

You can’t really say that Porridge is a baby dragon anymore though, he has grown a _lot_ in the last couple of months. Rupert’s head now _barely_ reaches Porridge’s shoulder, soon their dragon would be big enough to have his first flight with Amir and Rupert. Rupert looks forward to when they can all soar the sky together.

“And there I go again, thinking about what good times we could have if Amir wasn’t so busy all the time…” Rupert pouted kicking a rock down the grassy hill, Fitsroy took off after it.

“Your majesty shouldn’t blame King Amir too much,” says Chamberlain which makes Rupert jump, he forgot that he wasn’t alone. “Convincing the council to accept lady knights among our ranks is a very complicated and time-consuming matter after all.” the chamberlain sees Rupert’s face fall again and quickly adds: “uh-uhm, I’m sure that King Amir would be delighted to see your highness at lunch.” Rupert perks up at that and gives Chamberlain a bright smile. “You’re right Chamberlain! He _would_ be delighted to see me, I am after all, his beloved husband.” Rupert looks back and runs down the hill where Fitsroy tries to chew up the rock that Rupert just kicked.

“HEY! NO. BAD DOG!” Rupert grips the stone in Fitsroy’s mouth, but the dog takes it for a pulling competition. “THIS. IS. NOT.” Rupert begins to say but at that moment Fitsroy let’s go of the stone. “FOOD! EEP-” Rupert yelps as the momentum of suddenly pulling it free lands him flat on his ass.

Chamberlain looks down the hill and smiles as he sees that Fitsroy is now fiercely licking Rupert’s face while he is laughing in the grass.

*

Rupert lazily moves the peas on his plate around with his fork, resting his head on his palm and occasionally glancing up at Amir, who is nose deep in his papers and notes, Amir takes a piece of fish from his plate only to hover it in front of his face and put it down again.

Porridge is messily eating to Rupert’s left, and splatters fish and peas everywhere.

“Your fish will get cold like that you know,” Rupert says, Amir looks up from his papers and down to his plate. “Ah, right.” he says and eats the long cold piece of fish.

Rupert drops his fork and sighs dramatically leaning back in his chair, making Amir’s hand still from taking some notes and glance up with a question look.

They hold a small staring contest across the table.

Eventually Amir gives in and looks back down his notes. “Ha! I win!” Rupert exclaims, smacking his hands next to his plate triumphantly.

“What do you want Rupert?” Amir says slightly annoyed. “You have been sighing loudly for all of lunch now, if you want to say something just say it.”

Rupert removes his hands from the table and starts fumbling with his fingers, pouting a little. “Well, you have been so busy lately, that I just feel a little neglected I guess…”

Rupert quickly stuffs his cheeks with the rest of his food and blushes, his plan is _not_ to suddenly confess his outright feelings. What is he?! A lady who just confessed their first crush or something?!

Amir smiles at the adorable blushing hamster before him, gosh he loves his husband.

Amir clears his throat “Well, you can get all the attention you want when we’re in our chambers,” he winks, making Rupert choke a little on his food. “Otherwise, I’m sorry but I have to take care of this, Joan is depending on me to sort this through.” he stands up gathers his papers and walks over to Rupert who is trying not to choke on the big humps of food. Amir gives a quick kiss on Rupert’s pink cheeks.

“I’m going to check on how Joan is doing with her knights, I’ll see you later in the evening. Make sure you do _your_ duties too, okay love?”

Amir pats Porridge’s shoulder on his way out the door and nods at the guards before disappearing around the corner.

Rupert finally swallows his bite and drinks some water from his chalice then snaps his fingers, cheeks still of tints red.

“Yes, your highness?” his chamberlain says.

“What is next on my schedule?”

“After your lunch with your husband, your highness has an appointment in the town to check how profitable the harvest is.”

“Greeeaaat, so nothing interesting then.” Rupert sighs and stands up wiping his mouth with a napkin. “let’s go, lunch ended earlier than expected, might as well make some headway on the time.”

“Yes, your majesty.”

*

When Rupert walks past the training grounds on his way to the farmlands, he did not expect a very sweaty and fierce Amir sword fighting with Joan. Rupert has to gather himself after staring for a couple of minutes. Even though they have been married for quite some time now Rupert still isn’t able to get used to the fact of how hot his husband is.

He quickly hides behind one of the many quartz pillars that surrounds the grounds when Amir stumbles backwards a bit after a hard backhand from Joan’s sword.

 _‘Why am I hiding?’_ Rupert thought.

“Heyyyy,” says a voice behind Rupert, which makes him jump. As he spins his head around, he sees Cecily crouched beside him.

“H-hey, what are you doing here?” he stutters.

“What are _you_ doing here _my king?_ ” she counters. Rupert groans at the nickname.

“I uhm, I was just- uh – checking out the new recruits? Wait no, that sounds so wrong, - crap - what I meant was… uhm, I was looking at Amir train the new recruits? yes that! I totally wasn’t checking out his ass or anything!”

“You were totally staring at his ass while he was fighting.” Cecily says, and grins when she sees the other blush brightly as he looks away. “It’s okay,” she giggles. “I gotta say, he and Joan indeed both have very nice assets on them.”

Rupert looks up at her, in shock by her boldness.

“You and Joan are really close huh.” he blurts out. “I’m kind of jealous about your relationship at the moment.”

Cecily just looks at Rupert for a moment, “What makes you say that? You and Amir are literally _married_. - Unless he’s being an absolute dick to you – I swear if he hurts you I will-”

“No!” Rupert flutters his hands around, “No! Of course not! He would never hurt me Cecily, don’t worry, it’s just… He has been so busy with changing the laws and dealing with the sexist council that we haven’t really had any time to ourselves.” Rupert avoids her eyes by looking at Amir again. “I know what he’s doing is very important, and I’m certainly not against it or doing anything less than that, I’m just…”

“Lonely.” Cecily finishes for him.

“Y-yeah…”

“Wow Rupert, I didn’t know you were so needy for attention.” she teases. At that Rupert glares at her, but before he can say anything Cecily goes on: “I get it though, I had _such_ a tough time with even getting Joan to notice me, but eventually, after a lot of tries and whining, - her words, not mine! - She did. And look at us now!” she looks over at Joan dreamily, lost in her own memories for a moment, when suddenly her face lit up. “That’s it! That is exactly what you two need!”

“What is? What is it that we need?” Rupert asks curiously. “You’ll see,” is Cecily’s only response before she stands up and walks over to Joan and Amir fighting.

~

It has been a long day for Amir. And it isn’t even noon yet. The council his mother had chosen to help him when he started ruling has been unnecessarily reluctant about letting women and non-binary people to join the knights. And Amir has been terribly busy collecting enough evidence to convince them to change the rules. 

During lunch he had been reading through their (mostly stupid, in his humble opinion) arguments against letting women and non-binaries in and formulating counter arguments. He had looked forward to seeing Rupert but had to leave early to check up on Joan. He had seen the sad look Rupert gave him, and wanted to apologise, but after the checkup he had to attend the training of the knights-to-be. And even now, demonstrating sword techniques with Joan roughly two hours later, he still hasn’t had the time to. 

It has been bugging him for a while that he, Rupert and the council (that was really just a bunch of middle- to surprisingly-still-alive aged dudes) are the only ones who can really alter the rules. He is quite sure that there are people more qualified for this, but that is not what he needs to focus on now. He needs to focus on getting these trainees good enough to (metaphorically, of course) beat the council to a pulp and then some. 

He blocks Joan’s sword and, with a twirl, throws her sword into the sand. He looks Joan in the eye, and she nods. It’s the sign they discussed to signalize that a fight was over. He can see on Joan, and feel on himself, that they both are quite tired. The bright sun, that he and Rupert would otherwise have a nice picnic under, is not helping either. 

He glances longingly over to the area behind the fence covered in shadows from the weaponry storage building and some white pillars. Behind one of those is someone he had not expected to see. 

Cecily is sitting half behind it. Her once clean ‘spy-mission dress’ lying in a perfect circle around her, but her being there is to be expected when Joan is training. No, the person he is surprised to see is his own husband. Usually when only one of them is busy they catch up during meals and do something for themselves the rest of the day, but he _has_ been working non-stop for a while now. 

Cecily has an excited look on her face while talking to Rupert, while he just looks confused. Then suddenly she stands up and speed-walks over towards Amir. Cecily gets over to where he stood in record time and her smirk widens when she sees his confused expression, but rather than start up a conversation with him she yells “Joan!” and walks past him. 

The knight in question excuses herself from the conversation that she is having with a trainee about appropriate usage of flaming arrows and walks over to her girlfriend. “Hey Cecy, is everything alri-“. Before she can finish her sentence, Cecily grabs her hand and sweeps her away from where she was standing near Amir and starts whispering to her. 

Their backs are to Amir, but he can see that Joan is quite shocked from the things she is saying. Knowing them, that really can be almost anything, but Amir doesn’t want to pry in on a personal matter. 

He turns back to where Rupert was crouched and hiding behind- oh, who is he kidding, his husband couldn’t be stealthy to save his life. Amir waves at him, and Rupert seems to snap out of his thoughts and waves back. Then Amir gets an idea. He points to himself enthusiastically and turns around to the training field. Most of the trainees have sat down in little groups and are eating or drinking something. 

He approaches one of the better ones and asks them to spar a little. He knows Rupert enjoys seeing him fight, and a little extra training can’t do him much harm. 

Their swords clash and dance, and the light flashes off them beautifully. But because Amir is a more experienced fighter than his opponent, the fight is over quite soon. 

He gives the trainee (he thinks their name was Lune, but he’s ashamed to admit he doesn’t know for sure) some tips on how to improve their defence and looks back to where Rupert was. 

_Was_ , however, is the key word here. His husband is nowhere in his sight. He strains his eyes to see in the deep shadows that cover the entrance, but he’s not there either. Amir wonders where he went. First he comes to see him when he’s training, but when Amir finally has a little time for him he suddenly disappears? 

Amir is still thinking about that when Joan taps his shoulder. “Your majesty,” she says. “I apologize for getting dragged away. Lady Cecily needed some _urgent_ business with me.” she sighs and looks up towards the sky. “I know you have been working hard for a while now, so I thought _maybe_ , If you would allow me to, I could take over some of your tasks to relieve you of some duties. I could start with finishing the training?” she grins awkwardly.

Amir is taken aback. Is Joan not busy herself? “Are you sure? It’s a bit sudden to ask me that.”

“Yes, of course, don’t worry about it, i’ve got everything under control.” she moves her head up and down slowly, avoiding eye contact.

“All right,” he says hesitantly. “I am indebted to you then, do you by chance know where Rupert went?”

Her expression changes from poorly masked relief to even poorer masked guilt. “I saw Lady Cecily drag King Rupert away, I don’t know where they went though.” she bows curtly. “Excuse me, but I have to work now - goodbye.” she says as she spins around and flees to the front of the crowd.

Amir watches as she leave hurriedly and frowns, then shrugs and walks in the direction where Rupert had been and thinks of places where Rupert could have gone; the park where they always have picnics together could be a good possibility, then again - the bakery where they get a fresh batch of Rupert’s favourite cake imported every Tuesday is one of Rupert’s favourite places. But the fountain where the baby swans aren’t scared of them anymore because they feed them so often is where Rupert always goes when he’s feeling down

Amir’s mouth splits into a dopy grin as he thinks of all those good memories they made together when suddenly he’s rudely interrupted from his thoughts. 

“King Amir!!” Cecily yells at him, coming to a screeching halt right where he was about to step. “King Amir!” she yells again, breathing heavily. “King Rupert has been kidnapped!” She muffles a giggle with her hand before saying “Porridge has gone evil, you need to stop him, now!”

Amir is about to ask what game she is playing, but the second he tries to speak Cecily pushes him forward and runs off again. She looks over her shoulder and screams ‘The storage tower, tenth floor!’. Amir waves dumbfoundedly at a loss of words. He didn’t think Rupert would be as stupid as to use the same plan that has failed even Cecily a couple of times now. And Joan is twice as gullible as him. He guesses he must come up with some sort of speech now. 

When he is walking back towards the palace, he thinks about what he should say. Ultimately something that wouldn’t have him walking up the stairs to the _highest dang floor_ , but also wouldn’t make Rupert feel too bad. He did still love him after all, and he understands that he had been working a lot. 

He rounds the corner to the drawbridge to see Porridge curled around the top of the tower. He sighs. Rupert should know better than to pretend Porridge is evil, he is the sweetest dragon in all the lands and would never harm anyone, especially one of his dads. He speaks; “Oh great evil beast, will you not let down my husband? Have I not suffered enough by not only my lands being haunted by the _malicious creature_ that is yourself, but having to live with the guilt of having raised that pest? Please reconsider your actions and return to the righteous side!” he takes in a breath and looks up; Porridge has moved slightly, but is mostly looking bored and a bit hungry. 

He goes on, “You _vile_ monster! I knew not to have trusted you! You have crushed my hopes and dreams and eaten my spouse, how could you! I-” at that point he is interrupted by a yell from high in the tower: His husband is leaning out of the window and pointing at him.

“How DARE you believe Porridge has turned evil! And HOW DARE YOU assume he ate me!! He would _never_ , and you are terrible! Apologize, NOW!” His head is red from yelling, and Amir considers giving up and just walking up the stairs, but no. He will get his husband back, and he will tell Porridge he can have some of the horse snacks, but he will do it without walking those stairs. “Just fly over Rupert please! I have some time free and I don’t want to spend it screaming at a tower, it doesn’t matter how proud I am of our castle!” Porridge looks at Amir before being beckoned over by Rupert, and perches himself on the the windowsill. 

Amir looks over to the grand clock. The training will end in half an hour and he needs to attend the meeting after that. ‘Come _on,_ Porridge!’ he is aware of how desperate he sounds, but he doesn’t care anymore, Porridge already looks tired, and if this goes on any longer, he might fall asleep.

Rupert, meanwhile, seems to be whispering things in Porridge’s ear, who, speaking off, is looking like he really wants to be anywhere but here. 

At Amir’s call Rupert stops talking and looks up – well down – at him and starts whispering new things at the poor dragon.

He breaths fire and picks up Rupert in his claws, then takes flight.

For a couple of seconds they just hover in the air, but Porridge takes a current and swiftly flies over to a spot some meters above Amir’s head. Amir waves at them. “Greetings Porridge, and greetings Husband, could you just get a _bit_ lower?” 

Porridge snarls and in a flurry of movement, drops Rupert, scorches the ground next to Amir with his fire, and flies away towards the fields. 

Amir stretches out his arms to catch his husband and succeeds.

Amir can barely hold his balance and then- oh wow Rupert’s face is suddenly very close to his. Rupert flinches and Amir stumbles backwards before steadying himself and halts abruptly, making Rupert’s face crash into his neck. They look at each other and burst into giggles. “Hey,” Rupert says, “Come here often?

**Author's Note:**

> FEAR NOT!  
> We hope you enjoyed this fic, it's our first work on this platform and we have more fics in the making! If you'd like to give us some constructive criticism leave a comment and maybe a kudos?
> 
> Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/LumiNQuill  
> Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/quilllumi


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